Happy 4th Birthday!

My sweet Logan,

I can't believe you are 4 years old today!  Somehow it doesn't seem like I'm old enough to have a 4 year old, I'll probably still be thinking that when you're 24.  This year has been a little easier than the last three.  Probably because your little brother keeps me so busy :)  I wish both of you were keeping me busy.

I miss you so much!  Not a day goes by that I don't think of you.  More often than not I'm wondering what 4-year-old Logan would be like.  I'm convinced you would have been calm, quiet and thoughtful.  I'm not sure if that's just an image I've projected on you or mother's intuition.  Either way, it's how I see you.

We'll be visiting your spot today, be there with us please.  I know you're always around, I see and feel you, but it'll be especially important today.


I hope you met Baby Blaze last week and welcomed him with open arms.  Maybe he'll be celebrating with you and all of your other friends today.  Wish I could be there to see it!


I love you more than words can express!


Mommy

Camera Clean-Off

Size

Clothing size has never really bothered me.  I mean sure, I'd love to snap my fingers and be able to wear a size much smaller than I do, but since that isn't going to happen, I've just never seen any point letting the number on a tag bother me.

That is until Eli came along.  Kids grow so fast and the numbers on those tags change a lot.  I remember being excited when it switched from "Newborn" to "3 months", but after that switch, it's become kind of bittersweet.  I think I actually cried when I put up the 3 month clothes to make room for the 6 months.  And 12 months seemed like a pretty big step too.  But last night, we made the biggest jump so far and I was so NOT prepared for the sudden realization that my baby is a big boy!

Last night I pulled out my stash of bigger clothes with the intention of just getting out the 24 month short sleeve shirts.  I had noticed that the 18 month shirts were getting a little small but the shorts seemed to fit just fine.  When I started going through the pile I found some shorts that were 2T and just to see how big they were I decided to have Eli try them on.  Much to my surprise they fit perfectly.  Next I pulled out a 2T shirt and had him try that on.  It was a little big on him but not swallowing him the way I had expected it too.

And it was like he knew that the shirt was some status symbol too because he wouldn't let me take it off and kept showing off in it.

Don't get me wrong, I've noticed that he's growing.  Just the other day when I was cooking dinner I turned my back for just one second and when I turned around he had a knife in his hand that I had purposely put "a safe distance from the edge".  Thankfully he was holding the knife by the handle and he only had it for a second, but it scared me to death and I got onto him about getting stuff off the counter (and then I cried thinking about all the things that could have happened).  It really made me realize how much taller he has gotten.

He talks all the time which also makes me realize how much he's growing and he's starting to sing a little bit too.  He has become completely obsessed with trains and if there is a train on the tracks across the street from daycare I nearly have to drag him to the car.  He watches Chuggington and will sing parts of the theme song whenever it comes on.

And sometimes it's the things he says that makes him seem so much more grown up than before.  A few weeks ago we got him a couple of Chuggington train toys.  The next day we were going out to eat with Doug's parents and as we were leaving he picked up one of the trains.  I asked him if he wanted to take the train with us and he said "No, two!".  He picked up the other train and walked right to the door and I just stood there, kind of amazed.

I know he still has so much growing to do and I love watching him grow and learn... but I so wish I could slow down the clock.

Prayers and a Sneak Peek

It's crazy how after you've been through a tough situation it seems like you see stories similar to your own so often.  I'm quite sure the number of babies with health problems hasn't increased since Logan was born, I just take more notice because I've been there.  So today I'm asking you to pray for three babies who need the prayers.

First is baby Blaze Johnson.  His dad is a friend of ours.  Little Blaze was born early and has a problem with his heart.  He is scheduled to have his 3rd open heart surgery on Monday.  He and his parents could use all the prayers they can get through the weekend and on Monday.

Next is Halle Scott.  Her mom was only 18 weeks pregnant when she started dilating.  Halle Scott was born at 24 weeks and weighed only slightly less than Logan weighed when he was born.

Last but certainly not least is a baby not born yet.  Several weeks ago I happened to click on an ultrasound pic on facebook.  I thought it was a picture of a friend but turns out it showed up because my friend had commented on the picture.  It was actually a picture of a friend of her's.  Anyway, when I clicked on the picture  I noticed the profile picture of the poster was a tiny little miropreemie.  That made me very curious so I clicked to the profile.  Turns out this woman had a preemie born on Logan's 3rd birthday. God doesn't make mistakes people!  The ultrasound picture was of her rainbow baby.  I sent the woman a message telling her my story and that I was praying for her and her new baby and that I was there if she wanted to talk.  We've been talking back and forth ever since.  She is about 21 weeks and has been put on bed rest because of contractions.  Please pray that she makes it to term or at least far enough along that sweet baby breezes right through the NICU.

On a different subject, I told you already that in April we had our pictures taken by MckMama, well she posted a preview picture of our session and I personally think it's adorable :)

Easter and "Love You"

What a weekend/week we've had!  Last Friday we went to my parents' house for Easter.  Because we had the most time to spend with them on Saturday we decided to go ahead and let Eli do his Easter then.  First thing that morning Eli got his Easter basket which had a book, a couple of animal figurines, a coloring book, one little chocolate bunny and a stuffed dog.  He also got a bubble machine from my parents.  We went outside to play with the bubble machine and he loved it!  He kept saying "pop", every time he popped a bubble.

After his morning nap we "hid" Easter eggs in the front yard and let him find them.  He really enjoyed getting all the "balls" :)

 I put some small animal figurines in some of the eggs, had to come up with something other than candy.  He loves playing with the little figurines and they are perfect for car rides and at church, plus they don't take up much room in my purse.  We've been practicing on animal sounds so I got farm animals to help him learn which animals make which sounds.

Saturday night at dinner we let him have his chocolate bunny.  He only ate about half of it but he loved every bite!

Eli also helped Doug and my dad do some work around the house.  He has become such a big helper.  One of the things we did while we were in Birmingham was buy a toy box.  Up until now we've just been using little baskets and piling toys in one corner of the room but it was a little confusing for Eli when we asked him to help clean up.  Now, with the toy box, he does much better.  Last night I asked him to pick up and he put almost everything away without any help from me!  With my sister and brother-in-law moving in soon, we will have to do a better job of picking up the toys and I think the toy box is really going to help with that.

 On Sunday morning we all got dressed up and went to church.  Mass was beautiful, Easter has always been on of my favorite Masses of the year.  Doesn't he look sooo cute in his little suit!

Then Sunday afternoon we took Eli to a park.  This particular park had different areas for all different ages so we were able to let him play on his own for the most part.  It took him a while to warm up to the slides but once he got the idea he was zooming down them and clapping when he got to the bottom.

He played and played and then all of a sudden he sat down in the middle of the playground, just looking around and watching all the other kids.  He sat there for a couple of minutes and then stood up and starting wave "bye" to all the kids he saw.  We took that as our cue to leave!

Last night was a wonderful day because Eli said "love you" for the first time!  He's been signing it for a little while now but hearing him say it is so much better!!!

Getting this post up has been kind of crazy!  I was too busy on Monday to even think about it but yesterday when I went home for lunch I remembered that I wanted to post some of these pictures.  I grabbed the camera card and threw it in my pocket so I could look at the pics when I got back to work.  Unfortunately, I completely forgot that the card was in there until I got home and went to put the load of laundry (that included the pants I had worn to work) in the dryer.  I fully expected to see the card in the washing machine but after a lot of searching all I found was a paci (that we thought we had lost at my parents' house).  Doug and I talked through my whole day trying to figure out where I had lost it.  I even drove back to work to look around the parking lot, halls, bathroom and my office.  By the time we went to bed I had resigned myself to the fact that it was gone for good.  Then when I got to work this morning I had an email from a former professor of mine who works in the same building.  He had found the card on the floor and recognized Eli in the pictures!  I was so relieved to have it found and by someone who knew me!

I realize this post is kind of disjointed, but disjointed pretty much describes our life right now :)

Nothing Much

Wow, I can't believe it's been a month since I last posted.  The truth is I really haven't had much to talk about, and also we've been super busy.

We found out about 3 weeks ago that my sister and brother-in-law had an offer on their house.  Since they are going to be building their next house they will be moving in with us at the end of April.  So we've been busy little bees trying to rearrange everything to make room for them. 

Last weekend I went to my last consignment sale for the spring.  I got quite a few things and spent less than $35.  After we left the sale we went to visit a good friend who just had a baby and then headed home for a birthday party for one of Eli's friends from daycare.  Unfortunately, just a few miles away Eli started throwing up.  We had to stop and clean him and his car seat as best we could.  His clothes were soaked so I ended up taking them off completely and we headed home.  Thankfully he only threw up one more time and was feeling better by Monday. 

This weekend was originally set aside for finishing up some projects we started a while back.  I'm determined to catch up on things before we add two more adults to our household because I know we probably won't get them done while they are living with us.  But then I found out that MckMama was going to be doing photo shoots in Birmingham.  She is Stellan's mom and I've been reading her blog since shortly after Logan died.  So I set up a time and now I'm hoping I get most of my projects done on Saturday because we'll be having our pictures made on Sunday.

Anyway, not much is really going on.  We have about 4 friends getting married this year and several other friends having babies so I don't think things are going to slow down any time soon :)

Eli Update

It seems like it's been a long time since I've done an update about Eli and all he is doing so here goes.

Eli is just a few days shy of being 17 months old.

He was around 32-33 in. tall last time we were at the doctor's office and holding steady at around 25.5 lbs.  These numbers are vague because we've been to the doctor so many times since 2012 started I stopped getting exact measurements from them.  It all started when we got back from a trip to Kentucky in mid-January.  First it was just a cold.  Then Eli started running a fever and the doctor was worried about RSV and the flu since they were going around.  Eli tested negative for both of those so they decided it was a viral cold.  Then I got sick suddenly, also tested negative for the flu, but ended up developing pneumonia.  That same weekend, Eli developed c. diff and we ended up having to put him on an antibiotic for that.  This whole time I continued to run a fever so I had to go back to the doctor for a follow-up x-ray, they didn't find anything so they didn't understand the fever but told me not to worry unless it got above 101.  Then Eli started running a fever again out of nowhere for several days with no other symptoms.  The doctor did a CBC and a follow-up c. diff test but everything came back fine.  Finally, on Sunday morning Eli and I both went a whole day without a fever, it felt like such a victory!  I really hope both of us can stay well for awhile now.

Eli wears some 12 month clothes but mostly 18 month.  He wears size 5 diapers and size 6 shoes.

He loves to climb and run and throw balls (and sometimes other toys and food), he can catch a balloon but still misses the balls for now.

He still loves music and dancing and has come up with his very own dancey dance (if you don't get this, you've never seen Yo Gabba Gabba).  His favorite song is The Wheels on the Bus and he even does the motions.

He's starting to doodle with crayons and on his Aquadoodle, but it still doesn't keep his attention for long.

He can sign "more", "all done", "thank you", "please", and most recently "love" which we are using to say I love you.  He also combines the "more" and "please" signs to ask for things.

He's learning new words all the time so I doubt I could list them all, but some of the most common are: mama, daddy, pappaw, doggy, ball, car, knock knock, out, please, cheese, more, blankie, hi, light, thank you.  He also clicks his tongue when he sees a picture of a duck or you ask what a duck says.  He hasn't learned to say no yet, which is probably good for our sake :)

He loves books, both playing with them and letting us read to him.  He still enjoys bath time, at least when it comes to playing in the water.

He is using a fork and spoon pretty well although food on the floor is inevitable.

I've said this before, but it is so amazing watching him grow. He does new things that surprise us all the time.  This past weekend he spent about 20 min. building with his mega blocks and when he finished he brought his building to me.  It was only 3 or 4 blocks tall but he was so proud of himself and so was I!

He LOVES blankies.  We have little security blankets that he carries around most of the time but he's really not picky, any blankie will do in a pinch.  He's always trying to grab the extra blankies we have in the house so the other day I went in his room and got every single baby blanket we have and dumped them in a pile in the living room.  Eli loved it!