Introduction

Well, I've been thinking about doing a blog lately and I'm finally going to take the leap. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Anna and my husband's name is Doug and on June 27, 2008 our first son, Logan, was born at 24 weeks 6 days due to premature labor and chorioamnionitis. Logan was sent to the NICU where he seemed to be doing really well but on July 14, 2008 Logan chose wings over feet. Logan changed our lives forever and he is the reason for this blog. Since losing Logan, I have been lifted up and supported by many wonderful ladies all part of a kind of club. Not a single one of us chose this club, dreamed of this club, or even realized the club existed but all of us now belong together as Mommies of Angels.

As soon as I was admitted to the hospital I knew that I would forever be a supporter of the March of Dimes and when Logan passed I knew I wanted to do something to help other Mommies and now I'm starting on that journey. On Apr. 25 I will participate in my first (of many) March for Babies walk. I'm making t-shirts that say Logan with each letter made up of the names of the many Angels I have met through their Mommies.

However, this blog will mostly center around a different project I have started, Logan's Bears. This past weekend Doug bought me my first sewing machine and I'm now venturing into the wonderful (and slightly scary) world of teddy bears. With help from my mom I have created my very first bear and am now working on the second. Now, you might be wondering how this relates, so here goes.

Only hours after Logan passed I was given several pamphlets from the hospital as well as a memory box and plenty of keepsakes from Logan's short life: his thermometer and hats, diapers, a measuring tape, a blindfold type thing that was used to cover his eyes during his light therapy, a cut of his hair, little pillows they used to prop him up and blankets. All of these things gave me comfort but the pamphlets left a little to be desired. On the front, each one said something to the effect of "How to Cope When You Lose a Baby". Now these pamphlets were helpful because in the days to come I needed to hear that it was okay to feel crazy. But, what I really wanted was someone who had been in my shoes, to reach out to me, tell me I was doing fine. Don't get me wrong, I had tons of support in my family and friends but there is nothing like someone who has been there, done that. Soon, I found online grief support groups specifically for Mommies of Angels and, as I said before, these ladies have been an amazing support to me. In talking to them I have found a way that I can help future Mommies of Angels. I know they are out there and I know they have no idea that our club exists. But I also know that when they need us, I want to be there, available and easy to find. I want them to have support locally because, let's face it, living in the same town/state or delivering at the same hospital makes you feel more connected.

So, to let them know that we are here, I'm going to be donating items to the hospital to give to other Mommies of Angels. It will start with the bear, which will be handmade and will hopefully give each Mommy something to hug, cry on, and just hold, because when you lose a baby, you're arms feel SO EMPTY there is a physical pain to it. I truly hope these bears can give each Mommy a slight relief. Also, the bears will come with a card with a picture of this painting: http://www.pearlsofgracefineart.com/ministry.htm which is called Escort to God. On the back of the card will be a short message letting them know about this website and ways to contact us and get involved in other grief support groups. It is my wish that these cards and bears will give each Mommy a little, tiny bit of peace in a very hard time in their lives.